When Love and Hate Collide

Foulliners, there is something I need to get off my chest that I’m not very proud of. I am embarrassed to admit I am a huge New York Yankees fan. After writing this blog for the past year, I felt that now was the time to finally come clean. I love the Yankees.

I love their 26 World Series rings. They’re so retro.

I love the supreme intelligence of Hank Steinbrenner.

I love the rules that they have in place for Joba. Next year he may get to pitch 12 innings.

I love pinstripes. They even make Don Zimmer look slim.

I love their professional grooming policy. Because everyone knows beards don’t win ballgames.

I love that they have a $200 million payroll. Because $190 million only buys 4th place.

I love that they made the playoffs for 13 consecutive years. I love even more that it won’t be 14.

I love the originality of the Yankee Universe.

I love Mantle, Gehrig, Ruth, Berra, Boone, Jeter and Bucky Effing Dent.

I love when Mariano Rivera comes on the field to “Enter Sandman.” Metallica is huge in Venezuela.

I love to watch Alex Rodriguez mash home runs, collect MVP awards, and cheat on his wife with skanky strippers and geriatric pop stars.

I love the Bronx. I can smell it from here.

I love Giambi’s mustache. It distracts from his fat ass and poor fielding percentage.

I love the Yankee fans’ passion, loyalty, and 3rd grade educations.

I love “God Bless America” during the 7th inning stretch at Yankee Stadium. It reminds me of the 4th of July, when they were still in contention.

I love Billy Crystal and Rudy Giuliani. They throw better than Johnny Damon.

I love that the Yankees pounded the Rays last night during game one of their series.

I love that the Yankees have the chance to play playoff spoiler this season.

I love the Yankees. At least until Thursday.

42 Responses to “When Love and Hate Collide”

  1. your pop Says:

    love and yankee do not belong in the same sentence . if your a red sox loyal fan.. I know you have been taught better. DO IT A GAIN AND YOU WILL GET YOUR MOUTH WASHED OUT WITH BLATZ BEER.. when you ate you new balance sneaker I hope you washed them off

  2. Anonymous Says:

    I love the Trash the Yankees fan pick up from front Curb every Tuesday and Friday Morning
    I love the Pizza the Yankee’s fan deliver to my door stop
    I love the New York accent that sounds like a kid with Down Syndrome got hit in the head with a baseball
    I love that the number of Yankees fans has dropped drastically this season, wonder why?
    I hate the 1972 Dolphins

  3. Dave Says:

    This is some of your best work Dylan, it never gets old ragging on the Yankees. I might go to the Rays/Yankees game tonight. I’m having a hard time figuring out which team I hate more…I think I’m leaning towards the Rays, the Yankees are just sad. I almost feel bad for them. Almost.

  4. Anonymous Says:

    I don’t feel bad at all for the Yankess. But, I would love to see the bubble burst on the Rays and the Red Sox and Twins get in the playoffs and leave the Bay Area jumping on the Buc’s bandwagon. Go, um, ah, I can’t belive I’m saying this, Go Yanks…

  5. Dave Says:

    Perfect scenario for tonights game would be for New York to win by 20 runs, and for the Devil Rays to lose Pena, Iwamura, Kazmir, Shields, Navarro, Upton, and Joe Maddon to season ending injuries. I’m going to keep my fingers crossed for that one.. I just hope I can still get tickets, there was a whopping 25,000 in attendance last night.
    Meanwhile, Boston just tied the record with most consecutive sellouts in a row with 455. WOW!!

  6. Anonymous Says:

    One way for the Rays to boost attendance could be to actually squirt Orange Juice out of the giant Tropicana sign on the Right Field foul side. Like all over the place Orange Juice, since it is Tropicana field, just a thought.

  7. Dave Says:

    I’m at the game tonight, surrounded by Rays and Yankee fans. I have never felt better about haveing my Tetanus shot up to date.

  8. Anonymous Says:

    If the Rays win, and no one is there to watch it, is it still a victory?

  9. Matt McLaughlin Says:

    That was briliant.

  10. Dave Says:

    It’s nice to hear from you Matt, we were starting to worry if you were still alive.
    The Playoffs start next week. It’s shaping up to be: Yankeehaters vs, The Showstoppers, and Boston Braves vs. Love Boat Captains.
    Two very intriguing matchups!!
    Let’s get past this meaningless week and get the playoffs started.

  11. Matt McLaughlin Says:

    I was busy with the Miracle Playoffs, the Miracle managed to make it to the FSL Finals against Daytona, after beating Dunedin. They lost the first 2 at home Saturday and Sunday, and won last night in Daytona. We need 2 more wins and I get my FSL Championship Ring.

    Year Two of this league is going to be different, and much to the shigrin of Dave, my Brother is going to get in on it and we will have not 2 but 3 McLaughlins for him to lose to. Yankeehaters vs The Showstoppers, if Im not mistaken, doesnt this clinch the season series between the two of us? Im not sure, but this has a lot riding on it.

    -Matt “You know your good when the season ticket holders are starting a petition to the team for you to keep your job next season” McLaughlin

  12. Dave Says:

    Hey Matt,
    Congrats on a successful Miracle season. I’ve seen you in action as T.C., I can see why the fans started a petition.
    This week, will in fact decide our season series. This will not only decide bragging rights for the year, but leads to a trip to the finals. Good Stuff!. This will definitely separate the men from the McLaughlins.

    Dave ” Little do you know Matt, but you’ve ALREADY been beaten by 3 Ingalls this year” Ingalls

  13. Matt McLaughlin Says:

    hahaha, next year will be different, Dylan will actually finish above .500…er… or not…

  14. Dan Says:

    Hey Dave, are you attending any rays/red sox games next week? I just purchased my tickets to all three games.

    Sox breathing down are neck, kaz on the mound tonight, should be fun

  15. Dan Says:

    And as for the empty trop…. rays fans are running out of excuses, I am 18 years old with no car yet i have managed to attend 14 games this year, its very embarrising to see this team not draw any fans, the only thing i can figure is that most rays fans live in tampa, which means they have to cross the howard franklin bridge to attend games, and bringing there children that far on a tuesday against toronto on a school night doesnt seem worth it to them. The playoffs will sell out, and the boston games will as well, and the weekend games nearly sell out.

    Sincerely

    An embarresed rays fan.

  16. Dave Says:

    Dan,
    First of all, you have nothing to be embarassed about. You have proven all year that you are a diehard Rays fan. There are no excuses for fans not showing up, Hopefully there will be more fans like you showing up next year. I live in Sarasota County and still manage to go to games.
    I have tickets for the game on the 15th, I’m not sure about the other ones yet.
    Confidence is high in Red Sox Nation South. The Sox are healthy, it looks like all cylinders are firing.
    Good luck tonight…but not too much luck.

  17. Dan Says:

    Just the opposite for us rays ,scared shitless, If we cant get one in fenway, it could get ugly for us

    Oh well, boston/tampabay leads wildcard by 7 games

  18. Matt McLaughlin Says:

    Diehard and Rays Fan in the same sentence? Wow. Thats like saying Roger Clemens is a classy guy and Tie Domi wins the Lady Bing.

    All the props to you Dan, Baseball over everything. Its a beautiful thing. You should look into getting a job in baseball like me.

    -Matt “for all you unhockey-savvys, search youtube for Tie Domi Fights, and tell me he qualifies for the most sportsmanlike player in the league.” McLaughlin

  19. Dan Says:

    Just found out something intresting, in 1975 with fred lynn and jim rice, the sox averged 21,000 fans. this came after 8 straight losing seasons.

    rays fans are being dissed this season, is this the pot calling the kettle black???

  20. Boston " Fantasy League CHAMPION " Braves Says:

    Im still routing for the Sox to pull it out but the Rays are for real, how far will they go in the playoffs is the big question. Remember Yankeehater you didnt think the old man could beat you either. I havent talked trash all year but I do want to say it feels real good to have beaten you and Matt. The Championship was just a bonus. Pop this one was for you also so these kids will learn wiser is truely better…

  21. Dave Says:

    This week was just a good old fashion butt-whipping. That’s one of the things that I liked about our league, anyone could beat anyone on any given week. Having the best record, and quality players does not always ensure victory. Even if my team played good all week I would have lost. Your team played great aand peaked at the right time. Congrats. Enjoy this victory, you have bragging rights for the rest of the year. But, I do promise you, that I will come back next year stronger, smarter and more prepared.
    As for the Rays….Every time I think I have them figured out, they prove me wrong. I still like the Red Sox chances to repeat as World Champions, but the road there just got a whole lot tougher.

    Dave ” do we really have to wait until April for our Fantasy draft?” Ingalls

  22. Boston " Fantasy League CHAMPION " Braves Says:

    Boston Braves Foulline Fantasy Champions,,, Red Sox will Repeat….. Bye Bye Yankee Stadium and Bye Bye Yankeess Tonight ….

  23. Matt McLaughlin Says:

    *clap* *clap* *clap* the old man won the big game. wow, cant say i saw that coming 6 weeks ago. I would have put money on Love Boats and Team YH in the finals.

    I still think the 8 week winning streak I had in the middle to put me into contention was pretty freakin awesome. I know Love Boats had a streak, was it 7-8 or 9 weeks? All I know is that i am with Dave about the draft, but hell, we get to look forward to playoff baseball now.. damn, im so dissapointed. lol

    We need to plan a foulline playoff trip to the Trop. Seeing as how the Red Sox and Rays will be meeting in the second round.

    Matt “158 days until Spring Training Opens Up March 1st” McLaughlin

  24. busmanpop Says:

    Well for a few months the big mac paddywack gang will be dancing in the street!! YA DADDY WON IT ALL .OLDpeople can still play the game..NOW.. it gives every one THE REST OF US GOAL TO AIM FOR …LETS GET THE MCLAUGHLIN GANG ha.. next year should be wild.. again mac family dont wear out those dancing shoes. (THE Y H ,LBC AND THE BADBOYS WILL BE CHASING YOU ALL SOON THAN YOU THINK)

  25. Matt McLaughlin Says:

    All this means is I need to step up my game. I mean, I got the old man into it and he beat me at my own game. I slacked off a bit and he took it all. Im thinking more attention to spring training stats and finding those “fantasy hall of famers” is going to be worth it next year.

    Also, If I get the internship Ill be able to see guys first hand, and NOT from the inside of a mascot suit

  26. Dan Says:

    Guess its official, see you in the ALCS.

  27. Dave Says:

    Dave Mac!! (A.K.A) Fantasy Champion)
    I need your address and t-shirt size so I can send you your prize pack. My email is on the site.

    Thanks

  28. Dave Says:

    Side note: Red Sox in 4 games
    White Sox in 5

  29. Matt McLaughlin Says:

    Did the old man send you the info yet?

  30. old man river Says:

    old man! what am I suppose to get ? A box of Depends and hearing aid batteries would be nice. Maybe a dirty book with pictures. Ya thats what us old men want..

  31. Dan Says:

    Kudos to a certain someone who called this back around late june……..

  32. Dave Says:

    I’m gonna start calling you Ms. Cleo for your uncanny psychic abilities. Nice prediction. This is the series that everyone wants to see.

  33. old man river Says:

    MANNY WOULD NEVER HAVE SLIDE INTO HOME .. HIS FAT ASS WOULD STILL BE AT THIRD..GOTTA LOVE BAY.. GO BOSTON..

  34. Dan Says:

    Well it wasnt really that hard, these were the best two teams in the AL all season, if this series doesnt go 7 games, ill eat my computer. but on to a serouis question, u didnt think the white sox would really beat the rays did you?? i mean u only said that because you hate the rays right?

    side note, im goin to game 2!

  35. Christian McCrory Says:

    It’s the second comming. C-Mac is back and fired up more that John Cena and Royal Rumble. So why are we still hating the yankees? While we are still playing playoff ball Jeter and Arod are off golfing somewhere or doin gay porno. But really who cares? Has anyone looked west recently? What about those Dogers? This is a team that needs to be hated. Joe Torre??? Wasn’t he always a target in New York? Why should it be any different else where? Oh and they have a couple other renegades. Like a certain left fielder, who’s mysterious knee injuiry seems to just fine. The same left feilder that myself and about 38,000 others booed off the field this past july two days before the trade deadline. This was the same night John Lackey almost through a no no.(Alot of good that did him, all he acomplished in that game was showing the red sox his stuff for nine innings.) But thats a different rant. I wont say anything about Lowe or Nomahh, I still love em. But this team could very easily be facing us or the rays in the series. The sports media world would never let “the nation” live it down if man ram comes strollin into fenway and then proceeds to jack up the sox. He’s on fire, look at the stats and he’s hustling in the field and runnign out ground balls. What the F**k is that!!!!!! He could barely walk to first at times. I know manny can do some crazy things, like high fiving fans, or pissin in the monster during pitching changes but hustling thats just wrong. This could very easily be a sox dogers series and if its the case i think the nation needs to rally around and hate the dogers.

    PS Matt we should go to game one… Cummon its a once in a lifetime chance

  36. Matt McLaughlin Says:

    114 dollars is a BIT much for tickets. I have an 83 dollar parking ticket, Insurence and a Car to pay for. Thigns are tough. BUT I would LOVE to go. It would phenominal to see the Sox vs Rays in the ALCS. … Damn.,,,

  37. Dave Says:

    I’m gonna finally get around to writing something tonight, but let me reply to a few of your comments:
    Dan- First of all, congrats for scoring tickets. Dylan and myself both tried to get some, but were shut out. I hope you have a great time. Of course, I was wishfully thinking that the White Sox would beat the Rays. The Rays are scaring the crap out of me. These guys do not lose. It’s uncanny. I would rather play the 1927 Yankees than the Rays right now.

    C-Mac: It’s always a pleasure to see you come around. I agree with you about the Dodgers, Torre, and Manny are both enemies to RSN South. I’m also going to group Nomar in that group. Let’s not forget that he also quit on the Sox during a big Sox/Yanks series. So he’s dead to me also. As for Lowe..I’ve always liked him. I would not be surprised at all to see him in a Sox uniform again before he retires. He’s a big game pitcher.

    Matt Mc: Don’t be a cheap bastard, this may be a once in a lifetime opportunity. Have old man Mac spot you your allowance so you can get up for a game. And quit parking illegally. :) Also I’m still waiting for Dave Mc to send me his T-shirt size and address so he can collect his winnings.

    Go Sox

  38. Christian McCrory Says:

    Whoa dave i can barely afford the ticket theres no way i could spot him or i would. But the foul line could send us that’d be cool.

  39. Dan Says:

    I have a friend who won the regestration lottery and sold me a ticket, as much as i wouldnt want u all to go (the crowd should be as pro rays as possible) if u are going to try to score tickets, dont wear your sox gear or say your a sox fan, everyone in ray nation is saying there going to take advantage of sox fans and up the price by insane amounts because they know your desprete to get in.

  40. Dave Says:

    Let me check with our Accounting department..I’ll get back to you.

  41. Dave Says:

    C-Mac, I was referring to Old man McLaughlin to foot the tickets. Sorry about the confusion

  42. Christian McCrory Says:

    you know dave i realized right after i submitted that last one….i’m feelin a little slow today

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