After a few days at Disney World with the family I am back at thefoulline headquarters ready for Game 5. It’s game time, so this is going to be quick.

• Manny is an idiot. His comments contradict what every Boston fan is thinking. Every year matters. See my post Manny being Manny from September 4th for more thoughts on him.
• Signs your team and its fans are surprised they made the MLB playoffs
  1. Coming up with a stupid slogan. Example: “Rocktober.” I know that Colorado was amazed they made the playoffs with five no-name pitchers and a starting 9 that couldn’t be picked out of a police line-up, but this is really the best they could come up with? How about this one instead: Colorado Rockies: If we were in the AL, we would be watching the playoffs.
  2. Free towels to every fan that attends the game. Example: Cleveland’s “It’s Tribe Time Now.” This is without a doubt the dumbest thing they could have put on a free towel. It would make more sense for the Cleveland Indians owners to not only supply a towel to their fans but some soap and shampoo as well. This might help the bugs from swarming all of their stinky fans again.
• If Fox Sports shows that moron in the outfield playing the drum another hundred times tonight, I am flying to Ohio and punching that guy in the face. How does this guy play the Wizard Master in his bi-weekly Dungeons & Dragons game and still have time to play the drums at every Indians game? Oh, I know. I’m betting that he doesn’t have a girlfriend.
• How great is it to be a Red Sox fan? Down 3 games to 1 and nobody has pushed the panic button. Four years ago, people all over New England would be on suicide watch. Now, we are like, “they’ve been there before, they can come back.”

That’s all for now. I will be back first thing in the morning for the Game 6 preview.

Go Sox!

Well, I guess this would be a good time for the Red Sox to shake things up a little bit and win some games. I can’t really elaborate on this. The Sox have not been playing Red Sox baseball the last three games. It’s time to play desperate ball. They are capable of turning this thing around. After all, they’ve done it before.

With that being said, here are some baseball tidbits.

• I was walking around Disney World today with the family, and I could not believe how many people were wearing Yankee hats. There were quite a few Red Sox hats, but we were outnumbered at least 2-1. Don’t these guys know that their season has ended? Have they been working too many shifts at K-Mart to notice? Or could it be that there are some actual “real” Yankees fans out there. I will continue my investigation of this tomorrow. Stay tuned.
• The funniest thing I saw today was a guy wearing a Colorado Rockies hat. It was the old purple design. Now this hat must have been at least ten years old. What made this funny was that the hat looked brand new. It was like he remembered that he bought this hat on a family vacation to Colorado and threw it in his closet. Now that the Rockies are playing well, what a perfect time to jump on the bandwagon. Just like the rest of the fair-weathered fans in Colorado.
• Speaking of the Rockies, does anyone know when the NLCS starts? I can’t wait to see pitchers try to hit the ball.
• Being that I am on vacation from my “real” job for the week, I’ve decided not to shave. I asked my 3-year-old daughter what she thought of the beard I was working on. She replied that I look like Kevin Youkilis. Now I don’t know if I should spank her or buy her some ice cream.

That’s all for now. I’m saving myself for the next 3 games. Thanks for reading.

Go Sox!

Have you ever noticed that Yankee fans are only fans when their team is winning? Earlier this season, when New York was 14 games out of first place, there were no Yankee fans to be found. I have friends who are Yankee fans, and they would act like they had no idea that the season even begun. These guys would say stuff like, “I don’t follow baseball anymore,” or “I’ve always been a Mets fan,” knowing damn well that their team was stinking up the American League.

Unfortunately, with the recent success of the Evil Empire, the Yankees’ obnoxious, foulmouthed fans are back out of their parents’ basements and cheering on the boys in pinstripes. Over the past month, Yankee fans are suddenly back on the bandwagon. My friends are back to wearing their Yankee caps, spouting how great Joba Chamberlain is, being the fair-weathered fans that I’ve grown accustomed to. It’s going to be really fun to see them go back in their holes when Boston wins the division.

During my trip to Disney World this week, I was in a gift shop with my 3-year-old daughter. I was wearing my Red Sox hat, minding my own business, when a fat, hairy woman who looked like she belonged on Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride came up to me and said, “The Red Sox are choking! Ha ha, cackle cackle.” Which was really original. After looking at her name tag, which said “Helga, Bronx, New York,” I replied “You must be a Yankee fan”. She snorted, “Yeah, 26 rings, they’re the best.” Now, there should be a rule: if you’re fat and ugly, you should at least have a good personality. She had none of the above. I wasn’t planning on getting into a debate with this crazy broad over the Red Sox/Yankees history, but then my daughter looked up from the Mr. Potato Head she was checking out and said, “Daddy, the Yankees stink.”

And that’s the difference between Red Sox fans and Yankee fans. Even the youngest Sox fans don’t know what a bandwagon is.

There are a few things in this crazy world of ours that I truly enjoy, like the sound of my children laughing and going to Disney World with my family. But what I might like best of all is what happened Monday night: I watched the New York Yankees lose 16-0 to the Detroit Tigers.

Oh, how the mighty have fallen. It use to be you could spend 200 million dollars on ballplayers and assure yourself a trip to the postseason. Those days seem to be over. With a geriatric pitching staff, a manager who seems to be on life support (Seriously, has anyone checked for a pulse on Joe Torre lately?), and the 2007 AL MVP with one foot out the door, the Yankees have come full circle, from World Series champions to league laughing stock. It used to be if New York lost by two runs George Steinbrenner would have a fit in the papers. Now George just takes a few happy pills and dreams of the days when the Yankees were not the second best team in New York City. ESPN has it right. The Bronx is Burning.

Add this to the list of my favorite things: The Yankees watching the playoffs from home.