Twice this week, I’ve had two of my fantasy pitchers face off against my favorite baseball team. Although I would never wish for a Sox loss, I couldn’t help but to think, If Roy Halladay or Rich Harden could hold Boston to one hit and the Red Sox could win the game 1-0, then it would be a win-win situation. I could get a bunch of fantasy points, and the Sox could get some wins. Is there anything wrong with that?

Thefoulline.com quick hits:

• After being on the road for 17 days and flying 16,000 miles, I really hope Terry Francona lets this team sleep in tomorrow.
• Didn’t Boston have one of the better defensive teams last year? The last two games, they looked more like the Bad News Bears, not the World Series Champions.
• I still think Toronto gets into the playoffs this year. They play solid baseball and have the best rotation in the AL East. If B.J. Ryan can come back from his injury and resemble his old self, they will be a force.
• A juice-free Andy Pettitte looked lousy the other night against the Rays, with 5 innings, 8 hits, and 5 runs. Maybe a call from Roger Clemens will boost his spirits.
• Julio Lugo: That image in your rearview mirror is Jed Lowrie. Objects may be closer then they appear.
• Am I the only one that is ready to see Jacoby Ellsbury lead off? This guy provided a big spark for Boston in the playoffs last year. Why mess with what’s been proven to work?

I’ll post the standings for the first week sometime tomorrow. It looks like a pretty tight race so far.

This fantasy baseball league is sucking the life out of me. I can’t focus at work. I’m ignoring my kids. I spend too much time making blockbuster trades in my mind. All with the hopes of winning the prestigious title of “Best GM on thefoulline.com.”

I’ve been scouring other teams’ lineups trying to figure out their secret formula for success. Is having seven shortstops a good thing? Can my team win without any Yankees on it? Should I have focused on pitchers? Did I over think, and put too much stock in some potential up-and-comers? Should I have just used the damned Auto Draft?

Please help me if you know the answers to any of these questions.

thefoulline.com quick hits

• Last night Dice K lived up to his hype. Let’s hope he can do this all year.
• Has anyone seen the greatest clutch hitter in baseball? He wears #34 and spits on his hands a lot. If found, please return him to the Red Sox ASAP.
• Attention, Eric Gagne: I guess it wasn’t the city of Boston that caused your woes last year. It’s that you suck.
• It took all of three games, but I am done with J.D. Drew and his candy-ass excuses for the rest of the year. The Sox should send him down to Pawtucket to “rehab” his back, and bring up someone with heart.
• I’m not sure how to pronounce Cub’s right fielder Kosuke Fukudome’s name, but he might have the greatest name in Major League history since Rusty Kuntz.
• Fantasy Baseball causes Attention Deficit Disorder.

I’m sorry to make this such a short post, but with thefoulline.com war room up and running for tonight’s draft, resources are running low. So here are a few quick hits.

• The Sox split their Japan series with the A’s. Considering that they traveled across the world for this goodwill tour and still walked away with a win, it’s not too shabby. Plus, there are now a million Japanese fans who are part of Red Sox Nation.
• Maybe it’s time for John Henry to create Red Sox World.
• Jon Lester consistently pitches well for the Sox, but he always seems to give up a 3-run home run. Hopefully this will change with experience.
• J.D. drew loves to toy with fans’ expectations of him. He teased us with 7 RBIs in the first two games, then pulled a typical Drew move and removed himself from the opener with “back stiffness.” It’s a long season, he’s going to need to play with a few aches and pains eventually. But why would this season be any different?
• I wouldn’t take J.D. Drew in the 20th round of the fantasy draft. Dylan can have him.
• What type of bizarro world are we in when Julio Lugo and Brandon Moss are looking great, and Big Papi and Jason Varitek look like it’s their first day of spring training?
• Did Manny’s early success at the plate leap frog him into a first-round draft pick?
• There is still an outside chance the Sox will go 161-1.
• Did you hear about Jose Canseco’s new book? He claims that A-Rod was constantly hitting on Canseco’s wife. I hope no one tells this to Derek Jeter. I wouldn’t want him to get jealous.
• Brandon Moss was optioned to Triple A Pawtucket today. Something tells me he’ll be back.
• I guarantee that I will not pick any Yankees under any circumstances in tonight’s draft.

Just to echo “The Commissioner” Matt McLaughlin, let’s all have fun this season. Good Luck.

I wasn’t too excited about the Red Sox cutting their spring training short to travel halfway around the world for a couple of exhibition games. The Sox will have a hard enough time defending their title without having to fight jet lag, and it’s obvious that MLB is trying to capitalize on Boston’s recent success now that they are the best baseball team on the planet. But after watching today’s game, and seeing how excited the Japanese fans were to watch the World Series champions, I think maybe MLB got it right when they chose the Sox to be international ambassadors for baseball.

Thefoulline.com’s Quick Hits, the International Version

• MLB.tv used the Japanese broadcasters for today’s game. I didn’t understand a word they said, but I still preferred it to Jerry Remy’s incoherent babble.
• Dice K has proven that he is Japan’s version of Elvis.
• J.D. Drew has 7 RBIs in two games. He is on pace for 567 RBIs this season.
• I always found it funny that the Red Sox assign their rookies uniform numbers more appropriate for an offensive lineman or wide receiver. I’m pretty sure that Jed Lowrie didn’t dream about wearing #82 for a major league team when he a kid. I wonder if this increases their motivation to make the team, so that they can get a good number.
• Jonathan Papelbon was given #58 as a rookie and he kept it, but we all know he has a few screws loose.
• In an attempt to fix his dismal batting average of the past two years, Coco Crisp is now wearing batting gloves. It has to help, right?
• The Sox lineup has the chance to be special this year. A batting order of Pedroia, Youkilis, Papi, Manny, Lowell, Drew, Varitek, Ellsbury, and Lugo could wear down an opposing pitching staff and put up a ton of runs. Plus, this lineup gives Francona the flexibility to move players around if they aren’t performing well.
• Thefoulline.com’s public enemy #1, Jon Weber of the Tampa Bay Rays, is batting .211 this spring training. Public enemy #2 Doug Mientkewicz of the Pirates is hitting .273 with one measly RBI in 16 games. This just proves that you don’t mess with foulliners. Karma will come back to haunt you.
• Speaking of foulliners. Thefoulline.com inaugural fantasy league baseball draft is only three days away. We still have three spots to fill. If we don’t have ten players, the league will be disbanded, and we will never see Dylan chose J.D. Drew with his first round pick. Find a friend and sign them up!! There will be a great prize package for the league champion (me). Email me with any sign-up questions.

Have a happy Easter!

For some reason MLB.tv had legendary announcer Vin Scully call the Red Sox/Dodgers game yesterday. Wow! Listening to Vin Scully call the game made me want to move to Siberia and never listen to another game for as long as I live.

Scully is a huge name in the broadcasting world. He’s been calling Dodgers games for 57 years and has been inducted into the Radio Hall of Fame. But enough is enough. This guy needs to hang up his microphone and enjoy his golden years.

During yesterday’s broadcast, some of the poignant topics that Scully talked about included: a detailed lesson about every palm tree in Dodgertown; which flavor bubble gum Matt Kemp was chewing; the reason that Mike Lowell doesn’t chew gum at the plate; and a history lesson about the field the Dodgers play on. He even managed to call a few balls and strikes. And this was just in the first inning.

This guy is the reason that television and radio broadcasts added a color commentator. If you ever have the opportunity to listen to Scully in action, don’t do it. Find a WNBA game and watch that instead. You’ll thank me.

Thefoulline.com’s tantalizing tidbits and predictions for the week.

• If Josh Beckett’s back injury is even remotely serious, the Red Sox are screwed.
• If Julio Lugo’s back injury prohibits him from playing ever again… oh well.
• The Grapefruit League’s worst record belongs to the Boston Red Sox. The best record belongs to the Tampa Bay Rays.
• The Sox treat Spring Training as a way to evaluate their young prospects. The Rays treat Spring Training as their World Series.
• I think Coco Crisp is going to have a good season for the Oakland A’s.
• If Bartolo Colon’s ERA matches his weight this year, he will go down as Theo Epstein’s best transaction… ever.
• The 2008 MLB All-Star game will be held at Yankee Stadium. Manny Delcarmen will be on the American League team. Derek Jeter will not.
• Thefoulline.com fantasy baseball draft starts in 17 days. Spots are still available, and competition is fierce for 2nd place.

The Red Sox made a few smart moves yesterday. The first was a no-brainer, re-signing Terry Francona was long overdue. This guy doesn’t get the credit he deserves. Two World Series titles in four years is impressive, doing it in the pressure-cooker of Red Sox Nation is extraordinary. This guy is adored by his players and respected by all of Major League Baseball. He is truly one of the good guys in the game. When talking about the game’s great managers, Francona should be mentioned in the same breath as guys like Bobby Cox, Joe Torre, and Tony Larussa. Although his new contract is nothing to sneeze at, I really wish Theo Epstein made him the highest paid manager in the league.

The second move was signing 2005 Cy Young winner Bartolo Colon to a minor league contract. Although Colon has had his share of injuries the last couple of years, he could be a decent insurance policy if any of the Sox pitchers gets injured. He won’t make the team coming out of Spring Training, but maybe he can get in shape in Triple A and make a difference when it’s time for the playoff push. This guy has won twenty games in a season twice. He hasn’t forgotten how to pitch. Let’s see how he does when he gets in shape and the Red Sox pitching coach John Farrell gets a hold of him. Either way, it’s a low-risk, low-cost, possibly high-reward scenario.

thefoulline.com updates

I want to remind everyone that there are still spots open for the inaugural thefoulline.com Fantasy Baseball league. Please spread the word to your friends and family and have them sign up. It should be a lot of fun. Thanks again to Matt McLaughlin for setting it up. To sweeten the deal, we are working on a prize package for the winning team consisting of original thefoulline.com merchandise. So if that doesn’t motivate you, I don’t know what will.

Also, Dylan and I are heading down to Fort Myers on Thursday to watch the Red Sox play Boston College, and I’ll be taking some pictures to add to the site. I’m not an expert photographer, but I’m sure anything will be better than the glamour shots of ourselves that are on the site now. On a related subject, Dylan and I and couple friends of ours are “shipping up to Boston” for a few days in May to check out the Sox. Unfortunately the Kansas City Royals are in town while we’re up there, but any baseball at Fenway Park is good baseball.