Archive for the ‘Fair-Weather Fans’ Category

New York State of Mind

Don’t look now, but the New York Yankees have climbed to within three games of the AL East co-leaders Sox and Rays and are in Boston for a three-game set at Fenway Park that starts tonight. Like a bad case of athlete’s foot, New York refuses to go away. These guys have been decimated this season with injuries to Chien-Ming Wang, Johnny Damon and Hideki Matsui. Add to that the disappointing pitching from Ian Kennedy and Philip Hughes, plus the media circus of the A-Rod/Madonna/Cynthia Rodriguez/Lenny Kravitz Quadangle, and it is a miracle that these guys are still in contention. What is Hank Steinbrenner pumping through the air conditioning ducts to keep these guys motivated?

I’m not sure that the Yankees have enough pitching to make a long run at the playoffs, but you can be certain that Hank Steinbrenner will mortgage the future at next week’s trade deadline to at least make it interesting.

Objects in the rearview mirror are closer than they appear. Quick Hits

  • I don’t know what Joba Chamberlain’s problem with Kevin Youkilis is, but if he hits Youk again tonight, I hope he gets his face smashed in with a Louisville Slugger.
  • You can tell that autumn is here when the leaves change color, and you can tell it’s almost August when Manny Ramirez starts faking another injury. This season it’s his sore knee. It never fails.
  • The attendance at Tropicana Field for the last two games for the Rays was about 12,000 and 16,000. That equates to 30.1% and 40% of total capacity. I know that it’s not the temperature in Florida that’s keeping them away. It’s always fair-weathered in the dome.
  • Big Papi David Ortiz rejoins the Sox tonight after a long layoff. This might be the big move at the trade deadline that everyone has been hoping for.
  • Speaking of the trading deadline… I really hope that Boston deals Manny to the Mets for prospects, takes those prospects and adds a top-line Red Sox prospect to the mix, and makes a deal for Matt Holliday. He would make people forget about Manny pretty damn quick.
  • Playoff atmosphere at Fenway tonight, and there is no one better to have on the mound than the best big game pitcher in baseball, Josh Beckett.

Go Sox!

Mama Said Knock You Out quick hits:

  • Jacoby Ellsbury and Dustin Pedroia are the best 1-2 punch in baseball. It seems like every game Ellsbury slaps a single, promptly steals second, and then is driven in by Pedroia. They’ve made the top of the Red Sox order fun to watch.
  • Miguel Tejada promised a sick kid with Muscular Dystrophy that he would hit a homerun for him, and then he went out and hit one. I don’t care how old Tejada pretends to be, that was a classy move.
  • All is right in the universe tonight after the Sox bounced back and swept the Rays.
  • That sound you are hearing is the sound of Rays fans jumping off the bandwagon.
  • Announcers should be biased towards their team, but the Rays’ combo of Dewayne Staats and Joe Magrane take it to a whole other level. Listening to these two idiots go on and on over all the calls that go against the Rays makes me want to cut my ears off. Not to mention, Dewayne’s hair looks like a rat’s nest.
  • Dewayne Staats crazy hair
  • To further prove that Terry Francona reads, after writing about the Sox’s offensive woes, they went and put up 26 runs on the Rays during the three-game series.
  • Tomorrow is the most popular day of the week, Fantasy recap day! Let’s see if my predictions hold up.

Like the Weather

Living in Southwest Florida, I’ve always felt that I should try and adopt the Tampa Bay (Devil) Rays as my second favorite baseball team. After all, their tickets are cheap, parking is free, and they have a group of young players that could turn them into a winner in the years to come. But after attending today’s Red Sox-Rays game, I didn’t gain a newfound respect for this team. I found the complete opposite – disdain.

Just when I thought that the Yankees had the biggest fair-weathered fans around, here come the Rays to challenge them for the title. The Rays have sold out their stadium 10 times… ever. In past years, they couldn’t have filled the place even if they offered up free all-you-can-drink beer and the chance to play shortstop for the team. Even at the start of this season, the Rays were playing to half a stadium. But now that they’ve won a few games in a row, everyone and his sister are fans. And man, are they obnoxious.

For some stupid reason, instead of cheering when their team makes a good play, Rays fans ring cowbells. Why do they do this? I have no idea, but it sucks, and it irritates the hell out of me. Another thing that pisses me off is the ridiculous Rays fans that were talking smack like they just won a playoff game. The Rays just swept a team that was decimated by an Ebola-strength flu epidemic. They can stick their brooms up their asses. Let’s check out their record when the All-Star game rolls around.

Am I bitter that the Sox were just swept? Maybe a little.

Do I think that the Rays will challenge the Sox in the AL East this year? No way.

Are the Rays now public enemy #2 to Red Sox Nation South? Definitely!

Order of the Universe

George Steinbrenner’s mentally handicapped son and current Supervisor of Baseball Operations for the Yankees, Hank Steinbrenner, voiced his displeasure the other day to the New York Times “Play” magazine about the most popular fan base in all of sports. For those who missed it, Hank said: “Red Sox Nation? What a bunch of [expletive] that is. That was a creation of the Red Sox and ESPN, which is filled with Red Sox fans.” Hammerin’ Hank continued, “Go anywhere in America and you won’t see Red Sox hats and jackets, you’ll see Yankee hats and jackets. This is a Yankee country. We’re going to put the Yankees back on top and restore the universe to order.”

Now, we’ve let Hank say his piece, and we hope that he feels pretty good about himself. But here at we would like the opportunity to respond. First of all, Hank, you are a complete and utter jackass. I thought that your dad was a whackjob, but you have now earned the title of “Craziest Steinbrenner To Run a Baseball Team.”

The reason that ESPN televises more Sox games than Yankee games is that people want to see a winner play. Not a group of overpaid, aging, lying, steroid-enabling has-beens. America likes that Boston players keep their noses clean and stay out of the tabloids. This is a good thing for the game of baseball. Having twenty current and former players on the Mitchell Report, an adulterating third baseman and left fielder, and a tax evading shortstop on your roster, on the other hand, is not.

After Hank spouted his line of crap, younger brother Hal decided to add this little gem: “The defending World Series champions have a lot of talent, and [have] done very well the past few years, but let me put it this way: I don’t think [they] wanted to play us in the ALCS. So I will concede nothing. I think we’re better than [them].”

Well Hal, allow me to retort. Boston would have LOVED to play your team in the ALCS. Winning a World Series title is nice, embarrassing the Yankees in the process is even better. Your stellar lineup, with its seven-game playoff losing streak, scares no one. Add an inconsistent rotation, an unreliable bullpen, and the annual playoff choke-job known as Alex Rodriguez, and your team can count on another early exit next year.

The thing is, they may be right about the number of fans out there. But there is a huge difference between Yankee fans and Red Sox fans. Sox fans wear their hats and jackets all year long, regardless of their wins or losses. Yankee fans hide in their parents’ basements until their team starts to lead the division, and then they dust off their Yankee gear and reveal themselves as the obnoxious idiots that they are.

Hank and Hal, you are fortunate to live in the greatest nation in the world. Unfortunately for you, it goes by the name of RED SOX NATION. And I think it’s time you were deported.

A Giant let down

Hey Foulliners here is a inspired post by Dylan. It sucks that the Pats blew their perfect season, but hey let’s look at the bright side: We won’t have to watch Tom Petty “perform” during next years Super Bowl since I’m sure he’ll be in a retirement home. And more importantly, pitchers and catchers report to Spring Training in 12 days.

I’m not in a good mood at all right now, In fact, I’m downright pissed off. For so many reasons. Maybe all this winning in Bean Town has gone to my head and I need to brought back down to earth, because we all know we are familiar with losing. But, man, this Super Bowl hurt, wow!!! Driving home after watching the game with the rest of the, I received a text message from an ex-girlfriend, informing me that she was hanging out with some guy who had put $5000 on the Giants to win, and, well I don’t even want to type this but, the Giants won. How stupid is that? That one sentence pissed me off beyond belief. That to me is what is wrong with New York. Too many backstabbing fair weather fans willing to get crazy when they can win, and hide behind whatever rock or box they came from in NY when their “team” is not doing so well. We’ve said it so many times before, but, oh do I ever hate fair weather fans. And, well, here’s a list of other things I hate:

  • This years Super Bowl ads: pathetic, the writers strike is killing us all. The only good ad came from Will Ferrell who I’m convinced shot that during halftime in an attempt to save the sub par ads of the game thus far.
  • The ’72 Dolphins (and their fans): How many games did you win this year? How many Super Bowls did Dan “NutriSystem” Marino win? Go draft yourself another running back this year and see how that works out.
  • Sports Fans that aren’t from New England: Everyone in the country is suddenly against us. All of us. Hearing fair weather fans from Colorado, New York (that cheer for a team that plays in Jersey) and wherever else talk about how they are sick of the Pats, the Red Sox, etc.. etc… is absurd. New England is like the Harvard of sports fans. We eat, breathe, live and die with this stuff, give us our due.
  • Belichick’s Sleeves: He hates them too, that’s why they’re gone. Good call, Coach.
  • Trash talk that comes after a game: If you are too afraid to talk beforehand, don’t all of a sudden acquire a golden tongue and start laying into fans who were on board from start to finish. Just not cool.
  • Me taking my Dad to see the Pats and Dolphins this year: It was a great time. But, I thought pops and I may have seen history when we watched Tom and Randy and everyone else lay into the Phins this year, but now, it’s just another game I saw, let down :(

Well, I’m sure there’s more to it, but I’m ready to forget this Super Bowl and look forward to baseball season. Tonight was a let down. But, I believe 47 more days until Opening Day. So, buckle up Foulliners. et that mouse finger back in action to check the updates on the site. Go Celtics, Go Brui…, well, Go Celtics. Here come the defending champion Red Sox, let the fun begin. Here comes spring. That groundhog doesn’t know anything about seasons.

TheFoulLine live from Disney World

Well, I guess this would be a good time for the Red Sox to shake things up a little bit and win some games. I can’t really elaborate on this. The Sox have not been playing Red Sox baseball the last three games. It’s time to play desperate ball. They are capable of turning this thing around. After all, they’ve done it before.

With that being said, here are some baseball tidbits.

  • I was walking around Disney World today with the family, and I could not believe how many people were wearing Yankee hats. There were quite a few Red Sox hats, but we were outnumbered at least 2-1. Don’t these guys know that their season has ended? Have they been working too many shifts at K-Mart to notice? Or could it be that there are some actual “real” Yankees fans out there. I will continue my investigation of this tomorrow. Stay tuned.
  • The funniest thing I saw today was a guy wearing a Colorado Rockies hat. It was the old purple design. Now this hat must have been at least ten years old. What made this funny was that the hat looked brand new. It was like he remembered that he bought this hat on a family vacation to Colorado and threw it in his closet. Now that the Rockies are playing well, what a perfect time to jump on the bandwagon. Just like the rest of the fair-weathered fans in Colorado.
  • Speaking of the Rockies, does anyone know when the NLCS starts? I can’t wait to see pitchers try to hit the ball.
  • Being that I am on vacation from my “real” job for the week, I’ve decided not to shave. I asked my 3-year-old daughter what she thought of the beard I was working on. She replied that I look like Kevin Youkilis. Now I don’t know if I should spank her or buy her some ice cream.

That’s all for now. I’m saving myself for the next 3 games. Thanks for reading.

Go Sox!

Class is in session

Webster’s Dictionary defines class as “high quality: elegance”.

I received an anonymous email from a grammatically challenged Yankee fan yesterday stating the following:

“The Red sox have a culture of losing -They are a perenially dirty , arrogant group of misfit losers that continually and historically underachieve. Their fans have the same mentality-Regardless if they advance or not- the Yankees are a much classier group of winners -GO YANKS!!!!”

Now I take anything a so-called Yankee fan says with a grain of salt. These are the biggest bunch of fair-weathered bandwagon jumpers you will find in all of sports. But I thought it was odd for someone to comment on a team being underachievers when they had just won their division a week before. Not to mention, when was the last time New York won the World Series? Shouldn’t $195 million guarantee a championship every year?

As far as the “dirty” comment, I admit that some of the Sox players are disheveled, with pine tar on their helmets and baggy pants. But I don’t think having pine tar on your helmets is any dirtier than having your all-star third baseman banging a stripper while his wife is at home taking care of their three-year-old daughter. But that’s just me.

On the subject of the Yankees being classier: Sure they look pretty in their pinstripes, with their perfectly coiffed hair and lack of facial stubble, but how classy is it when your owner tells the manager, right before one of the biggest games of the year, that he needs to win or he’s out. Joe Torre is dealing with enough pressure to turn his team around. He doesn’t need a whack job micro-manager on his case too. New York is more worried about what the package looks like on the outside than what the quality of the person is on the inside. When is the last time you’ve heard anything negative in the tabloids about the Red Sox ownership or players?

It’s not even worth getting into a debate with some Yankee fans. They have an “I’m better than you” attitude, and that’s never going to change.

But what do I know? I’m just a dirty, arrogant, underachieving, classless misfit loser. But I’m loyal, and I’ve never jumped on the winning bandwagon.

This whole thing leaves a sour taste in my mouth, like a bowl of rotten lemon Jell-o.

An open letter to Yankee fans

Dear Yankee fans,

I wanted to write a quick note to you all during your time of need. I know how hard it must be to get destroyed by a team you usually have success against. A 12-3 loss in a playoff game must be devastating. I don’t know if you will ever be able recover from this.

To make matters worse, this is the fifth playoff game your beloved Yankees have lost in row. It is so sad to see this once proud franchise struggling. Here is what concerns me: I fear that this might be just the beginning of the Yankee demise. After backing into the playoffs, your team is on the verge of losing such notable players as Alex Rodriguez, Mariano Rivera, and Jorge Posada to free-agency. I don’t see how losing these players could possibly help your situation.

I do have one great idea. I would make every attempt to re-sign Roger Clemens. This guy has been a rock for your ballclub this year, worth every penny of his $28 million salary. Even with his 6-6 record and 4.18 ERA, re-signing this guy needs to be a priority. It doesn’t matter that he’s 58 years old. Age shouldn’t matter. What matters is that this guy is still willing to pimp himself out to the highest bidder, even if his best days are long over.

I know Yankee fans support their team through the good times and the bad, and would never jump off the bandwagon in the their time of need. And with the Mets sucking almost as bad as the Yankees, where could a New Yorker possibly turn to in this desperate hour?

Here at, I want you to know that we are here for you during your time of need. Since a World Series title seems like such an impossibility any time in the future, I thought maybe you could take a walk down memory lane, and talk about the Yankees’ 26 rings. Even though none have come in this decade, I can appreciate how reliable this argument is for you as a crutch.

I hope that you find comfort in this letter, and know that in the past your franchise was once great. But the time has come to take a long look into the mirror and say those nine words that will ease your sorrows: “I should have been born a Red Sox fan.”

Take care, and enjoy your rapidly approaching offseason.