An open letter to Yankee fans

Dear Yankee fans,

I wanted to write a quick note to you all during your time of need. I know how hard it must be to get destroyed by a team you usually have success against. A 12-3 loss in a playoff game must be devastating. I don’t know if you will ever be able recover from this.

To make matters worse, this is the fifth playoff game your beloved Yankees have lost in row. It is so sad to see this once proud franchise struggling. Here is what concerns me: I fear that this might be just the beginning of the Yankee demise. After backing into the playoffs, your team is on the verge of losing such notable players as Alex Rodriguez, Mariano Rivera, and Jorge Posada to free-agency. I don’t see how losing these players could possibly help your situation.

I do have one great idea. I would make every attempt to re-sign Roger Clemens. This guy has been a rock for your ballclub this year, worth every penny of his $28 million salary. Even with his 6-6 record and 4.18 ERA, re-signing this guy needs to be a priority. It doesn’t matter that he’s 58 years old. Age shouldn’t matter. What matters is that this guy is still willing to pimp himself out to the highest bidder, even if his best days are long over.

I know Yankee fans support their team through the good times and the bad, and would never jump off the bandwagon in the their time of need. And with the Mets sucking almost as bad as the Yankees, where could a New Yorker possibly turn to in this desperate hour?

Here at, I want you to know that we are here for you during your time of need. Since a World Series title seems like such an impossibility any time in the future, I thought maybe you could take a walk down memory lane, and talk about the Yankees’ 26 rings. Even though none have come in this decade, I can appreciate how reliable this argument is for you as a crutch.

I hope that you find comfort in this letter, and know that in the past your franchise was once great. But the time has come to take a long look into the mirror and say those nine words that will ease your sorrows: “I should have been born a Red Sox fan.”

Take care, and enjoy your rapidly approaching offseason.


8 Responses to “An open letter to Yankee fans”

  1. MaticusNineO Says:


    I think the reason why they are choking is because they swallowed the rings like I suggested. See they must not be THAT ignorent, theyre doing us a favor.

    btw, The Tribe put up an ASS kicking last night. No matter who the Yanks had hurling, they looked completly ineffective. That is a good ball club up in Cleveland.

  2. Dave Says:

    As I’ve said before, the Indians are the one team that I truly worry about this postseason. They seem to have a “I don’t give a crap” attitude and refuse to be intimidated. They played good last night.
    I think the Yankees need to take some of the blame for last night loss. Any time you get C.C.Sabathia to allow six walks you need to make him pay. The Yanks had their chances with the bases loaded and failed to capitalize.
    I don’t see it getting any better for New York any time soon. Man, I would love to see a sweep.

  3. Anonymous Says:

    To any yankees fan: I have a spare room open at my house for spring training ’08, hope you guys have a very relaxing off season. I’ll be busy with the Red Sox actually winning in the post season for the next few weeks, but after the series is over give me a call.

  4. MaticusNineO Says:

    Why is it that I feel like I am the only person Riding JD Drew. I feel like every defends him and their response, “Oh lay off, hes hot.”


    When Drew appeared to be injured during his at bat in like the 3rd or 4th, I was jumping for joy. JACOBY! But no, he had to stay in there to go a farther 0-3 after his “lucky” single in the 1st. Im not a fan. I need someone to tell me a reason to like him becides, A) hes a Red Sox, and B) “he’s hot right now”.

    HES NEVER BEEN HOT. Someone please disprove me. Its driving me crazy.

  5. MaticusNineO Says:

    SOX WIN SOX WIN!!!!!!!!!!!



  6. Dave Says:

    Hey Maticus,
    I agree with you about JD Drew. There has never been a Red Sox player that has infuriated me at the same level as Drew. I have wrote several posts about this. He has driven me crazy this year.
    Here is the bad news, he isn’t going anywhere. No other team would even consider him. He has made Boston a laughingstock with this ludicrous signing. He has been a underachiever on every team he has played for.
    Now if I can play devils advocate for a minute. This guy has a ton of skill, and unlimited potential. There is definitely an adjustment period when new players come to Boston.. He has played much better in September when he hit .370. And I don’t think you can discount his single last night that brought in runs. That was huge!. I know JD Drew will make you pull your hair out, but we are stuck with him. Let’s try to make the best of it.

  7. Anonymous Says:

    I don’t know all the details on it, but isn’t he going through a big personal crisis this season with his son being deathy ill for the majority of the year. Granted, he has not performed, but I’m sure that has a lot to do with it. All bad memories can be erased though with good post season performances.

  8. Dave Says:

    His 3 year old son had a surgery that put him in a body cast. I can see how this would effect anybody. Add the fact that his wife is 8 months pregnant, he’s doing ok. A couple more RBI’s today would be nice.

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