Archive for April, 2010

I Got the Power

Over the past two weeks I have received dozens of phone calls, text messages, emails, and blog comments from family, friends, state senators, and fantasy competitors, and they are all asking me the same thing: “Dave, how the hell do you come up with your weekly power rankings?”

Well foulliners, I have good news. Unlike Colonel Sanders, I am going to share with you my secret recipe of herbs and spices that allows me to compile the most accurate fantasy baseball power ranking.

Here you go.

1. Total Points
The team with the most total points in the league gets 10, second most 9, and so on and so forth all the way down to 1 point for the bottom of the barrel.

2. Streak
A team on a winning streak gets one point for every game in the streak. A team on a losing streak gets -1 for every game in the streak.

3. Fear Factor
This is simply how much fear that opponent would strike in me if I had to face them in that particular week.
There is a range from -5 for a team that doesn’t scare me at all to +5 for a team that scares the crap out of me.

4. Expectations
This part of the score adjusts for whether a team is over-performing or under-performing. Subtract up to 5 points if the team is playing better than they should, and add up to 5 points for a team that’s slumping.

And that’s it! Now you’ve seen what goes into the weekly rankings. SO PLEASE STOP CALLING!!

Get’cha Head In The Game, Week 2

Hello Foulliners! What another exciting week of fantasy baseball. All the games went down to the wire Sunday and were a lot of fun to watch. After two weeks, some teams are starting to show their dominance while others are making it clear they need to pick their game up.

I took a look at Week 3’s schedule, and we have another round of great matchups. This week, in addition to the power rankings, I’m going to try and predict the winners of all the games.

Let’s start with an easy one:

the Haitian Hammer (2-0) vs. Yankeehaters (0-2)

This is the no-brainer of the week. This week the Haitian is the Hammer and the Yankeehaters are the nail.

Rays Those Cowbells (1-1) vs. unsportsmanMike (0-2)

Mike got some good points from his outfield this past week and has an above-average rotation, but looking at his team, I’m not surprised to see him 0-2. What makes it worse is that he’s facing RTC fresh off the big win against the defending champions. Confidence is high in the RTC camp. Should be a cake walk.

chefdick (0-2) vs. Boston Badboys (2-0)

I don’t know much, but I do know that chefdick’s team is a lot better than his record. Chefdick has made a couple of brilliant moves that have improved his squad. When Cliff Lee returns in a few weeks, his already strong team will be even stronger. On the other hand, I still do not like the Boston Badboys team. They are the most overrated undefeated team in fantasy baseball. I guarantee that chefdick wins big this week.
WINNER: CHEFDICK in a blowout

Less than Zero (1-1) vs. Team One (2-0)

I think that this is going to be the game of the week. Both teams are solid top to bottom with great starting pitching. With equal pitching starts, this one is a coin flip. After scouring their lineups, I predict…
WINNER: TEAM ONE in a nail-biter

Love Boat Captains (1-1) vs. RedRays (1-1)

Fresh off a humiliating loss to Rays Those Cowbells, the LBCs will be highly motivated to take down the resurgent RedRays. The LBCs were hampered by cold hitters and mediocre pitching; this past week was an anomaly that won’t happen often this year. Meanwhile the RedRays’ Matt “Weird Beard” Garza and Adam Wainwright combined for 700 points this past week and promise to be fantasy studs all year long. Unfortunately for the RedRays, the rest of his starting lineup is average. Scott Kazmir, Colby Lewis, and Kevin Slowey are two-starts this week, and I’m not entirely sure that it’s a good thing. All three have the potential to put up huge negatives in points. I think this one will be close.

You know what they say, if you can’t play fantasy baseball well, you can always write about fantasy baseball.


  1. Team One
  2. Boston Badboys
  3. Rays Those Cowbells
  4. Less Than Zero
  5. Love Boat Captains
  6. the Haitian Hammer
  7. RedRays
  8. chefdick
  9. unsportsmanMike
  10. Yankeehaters

Good luck to all this week. Have fun!

Get’cha Head in the Game, Week 1

The more things change, the more they stay the same.

Our third season of fantasy baseball is under way, and I’m already noticing a common theme from previous years. It’s become a tradition for Team Yankeehater to get destroyed by Less than Zero in week one. It happens every year. Ugh!

Secondly, the damn Love Boat Captains always assemble a solid team and proceed to mow down the entire league. She’s on her way again.

Thirdly, Team Boston Badboys will score a million points one week, followed by a week where he barely cracks double digits.

And finally, Rays those Cowbells drafts a good team, only to have his players start dropping like flies to the injury bug.

One thing that promises to change this year: Team Yankeehater doesn’t plan on losing in the finals. Consider yourselves warned.

It’s early, but here are your power rankings:

  1. Love Boat Captains
    She’s not ranked #1 just because she’s the defending league champion. She’s #1 because she’s assembled a tough team from top to bottom. Not to mention, she may be the toughest trade negotiator in the league. Rays those Cowbells is going to have bad dreams about his LBC matchup next week… again.
  2. Less Than Zero
    Halladay, Lester, Youk, Teixiera, McCann, Cano… a murderer’s row of fantasy excellence. LTZ drafts his ass off every year. Let’s see if he makes improvements during the season to go deep into the playoffs.
  3. Boston Badboys
    The BBBs put up a ton of points this week and are worthy of a 3rd place ranking… for now. But I guarantee Vernon Wells will not hit 36 points again this season, and that shaky starting pitching will catch up to him. I predict that the Badboys will be watching the playoffs again this year.
  4. Team One
    This autodrafted team loaded up on starting pitching and it’s paying off for him in a big way. I’m not sure he’ll rank this high all year — he has a few glaring holes in his lineup. But as I think we all know, pitching wins ball games, even in the fantasy world.
  5. chefdick
    Any team that has Albert Pujols on it has to be in the top five. Add Evan Longoria, Matt Kemp, and Kendry Morales, and you have a team that will be tough every week. The chef may have cooked up a stinker this week, but I don’t think anyone will be looking forward to playing him this year.
  6. the Haitian Hammer
    At the time I’m writing this, Team HH is in a dogfight with his brother-in-law. This is another team that’s loaded with starting pitching. I’m just not sure I would count on a lineup that features an infield consisting of Dan Uggla, Orlando Cabrera, and Chipper Jones. He definitely has the trade chips if he’s looking to improve.
  7. RedRays
    This team every year is like the little engine that could. He puts together a team of good, not great, players and competes his butt off every year. Team RedRays has a knack for finding the diamond in the rough. I’m sure he’ll kick my butt in week two.
  8. Rays Those Cowbells
    I could have put RTC anywhere from 5-8 in the rankings. I decided on 8 due to the fact that he has the defending champion LBCs in week two and could be staring at a 0-2 hole to start the year. But with good pitching, above-average hitters, and a willingness to deal to make his team better, Dan won’t be in the 8-hole much longer.
  9. unsportsmanMike
    Another victim of the dreaded autodraft. Team UM includes some above-average pitching led by King Felix, but his closer situation is god-awful. Mike took a big step forward today by picking up Trevor Hoffman from the Badboys. This team just doesn’t strike a lot of fear in me. But unsportsmanlikeMike is new to the league and a serious wildcard, so we’ll see how he responds to his week-one shellacking.
  10. Yankeehaters
    The no-brainer of the week. My team sucks. I have a million pitchers, and they all stunk it up this week. Is it possible for them ever to get their stuff together?? Who knows? Maybe I should make another trade??

23 weeks and counting until the playoffs. Good luck everyone!